"Not" the Black Corset Run Report
Sunday 5th December 2004

"NOT" THE BLACK CORSET RUN REPORT - 5TH DECEMBER 2004

Panos, aka The Fat Controller, had promised & even posted on the SPC website
notice that there was to be a special guest pillion for the Black Corset Run
on 5th December, namely the by now infamous "fair Rachael".

Having known Panos for just a few months & only been on a few observed runs
with him, he suggested I should join in on this run & see how I get on.

Meeting at the Winnall Tesco's Fuel station at 9.30 we were greeted
with a laminated picture of "fair Rachael" strapped to the pillion of Panos's
Sunny Yellow GS. NOT quite what we had been led to believe
and judging by the number of riders present, one could suspect
this view had been shared by more than one!

The weather was just perfect. It was wet, muddy, overcast, drizzly & misty,
but not too cold. I was very sceptical as to whether my ability was going to let me down
in amongst what were obviously a seasoned and highly skilled bunch of riders.
I enjoy riding at a good pace in the dry, but have never excelled in the wet.
Panos had told me my technique needed improving
so today was going to be do or die.

We set off up the A34 and then headed off to Stockbridge and then carried on
along the A30 to Salisbury and beyond. On the way to Shaftesbury and after a lot of
lovely wiggly & sweeping roads we came across the "Zig Zag" hill.
I had been told about this, but couldn't have been prepared for the tightness of the bends.
As I weaved down the hill at what I perceived to be a pathetically slow pace,
I spotted in my mirrors one of our bunch gaining on me at a rapid rate of knots.
I had already dropped my speed to less than walking pace, or so it appeared anyway.
Not wishing to get in his way, I pulled over off the line & watched eagerly in the mirrors.
Eh up, I thought. I reckon I'm going to learn something good here in the technique department.

I waited to see him overtake on the inside as we rounded the tight right hander,
but no... as I looked in the mirror, both feet came off the pegs & the "straight on"
manoeuvre appeared to be well under way. I suppose I did learn something in a way.
Even the most experienced & competent riders make slight errors of judgement from time to time.
No disrespect meant to the rider in question, but Panos has asked me to include this bit in my write up.

Now this is where I get to take the michael out of myself. Having entered Shaftesbury,
I followed the markers' directions quite happily until the roundabout by the Little Chef.
I took the last marker's instruction as straight on, which I duly did...
straight past the entrance to the Little Chef where everyone else had gone.
Unfortunately there were no turnings off of this road until well past the A303.
So whilst aware there were no riders in my mirrors, I felt confident that if I upped the pace,
I'd soon catch the leading pack & Panos. By the time I saw the Warminster sign,
even my small brain worked out something was wrong.

So back I went, confident I'd be having a lonely ride home on my own.
As I retraced my steps I came back to the Little Chef roundabout and thought
 I'd just try going in the direction I thought the ride would be heading.
On the relevant exit from the roundabout I spotted a marker waiting for some riders.
I stopped and he explained that either he was lost or the rest of his lot had gone wrong too!

As I continued down the A30 I felt confident I could hear Panos on the radio,
surely not! Unbeknown to me, the Little Chef was overlooking the roundabout
I had returned to. Panos had rushed out and was in hot pursuit of the "lost sheep".
I eventually met up with him and returned to the Little Chef for a slow hand clap greeting...woops!

The rest of the ride went without any incident. The road conditions & weather became worse
with plenty of "slippy bits". Lunch was at the Wicked Breakfast Cafe, where watching Panos
take on more "ballast" was an awe inspiring sight to a mere mortal.
He says amongst other things, it helps him put more rubber on the deck.

After lunch, a pleasant ride back through some more wiggly & sweeping roads
with hardly a car in sight in the direction of Shaftesbury, Salisbury and finally Stockbridge.
Then home to wash off the amazing amount of dirt that had deposited itself all over the bike.
Looked like my Dirt Bike after a day's worth of Green Laning.
Apparently, the remaining "usual suspects" joined by Chris, Phyl and Simon
waiting for them at Stockbridge, followed John back to his house for tea,
coffee and some festive food. Panos tells me the mincemeat pastries were awesome,
especially with cream! It remains for me to thank to Panos for leading,
John for bringing up the rear and everyone who helped to make my first Sunday
social ride-out with the Group a very enjoyable one.

- Paul (Baldrick) Edwards on the 1100RT